“I’m Fine…”

It’s been two years, two years since my life forever changed. Since the person I grew to be, completely vanished.  That girl I used to know is gone. She will never come back. In one second, the entire baseline of who I was left this world.  The second you left, I left with you. 730... Continue Reading →

Time.

Time. There is never enough time.  There is never enough amount of time to have a living soul here on earth.  Time comes and goes, flashes from one moment to the next. We measure time in seconds, minutes, hours…  But after I lost you, I don’t measure time anymore.  I measure time by my memories... Continue Reading →

Alice in Wonderland

It happens again.. I feel like Alice in Wonderland.. falling down a big, black hole and never being able to find my way out again.  It will always happen.  It will always be like this.  I'll always be Alice in Wonderland, falling down that dark hole. That’s what grief is.  That’s what it means to... Continue Reading →

Side Effects.

Since I lost you, I lost myself. I had to start over. I had to try to live again. Since I lost you, I developed severe mental illnesses. I’ve developed severe anxiety, that came with PTSD.  I have also developed a panic disorder.  All for which I now take multiple medications multiple times a day.... Continue Reading →

Out of the Darkness

It’s like you knew, all along.  You knew how much hatred and despair this world was in. You knew the downfall of this world we live in. The massacre of shootings, all the bad in this world.  You saw it.  You felt it. Your heart was too kind and gentle for this corruptive world we... Continue Reading →

Your Last Goodbye

You never said goodbye.  I never got to tell you how much I love you, or how much you mean to me.  I never got to tell you what an amazing person you are, how you have the world’s kindest heart. I never got the chance to hug you one last time. You did leave... Continue Reading →

Pain and Peace.

A dream of you. So precious. Something I hold on to every time I close my eyes. Everything always seems so real. You are so real, so hauntingly real in my dreams. You always come back to me.  You are always alive in my dreams.  You are alive in my dreams, but gone in my... Continue Reading →

Mental Illness.

Mental illness. We live in a world where people are so accepting of any body part breaking down other than our brains.  Society has created a negative stigma associated with mental illnesses. And that’s ignorance. And that ignorance has created a world that doesn’t understand mental illnesses. I used to be that person. I used... Continue Reading →

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