The Abuse Lives On.

My dreams. The reoccurring memories that continue to play in my mind, every time I close my eyes each night I dream of you.  My dreams are a constant reminder that you are still gone, and that you’re never coming back. I’ve tried blocking out everything bad, everything bad in my past so I can... Continue Reading →

“I’m Fine…”

It’s been two years, two years since my life forever changed. Since the person I grew to be, completely vanished.  That girl I used to know is gone. She will never come back. In one second, the entire baseline of who I was left this world.  The second you left, I left with you. 730... Continue Reading →

Time.

Time. There is never enough time.  There is never enough amount of time to have a living soul here on earth.  Time comes and goes, flashes from one moment to the next. We measure time in seconds, minutes, hours…  But after I lost you, I don’t measure time anymore.  I measure time by my memories... Continue Reading →

Alice in Wonderland

It happens again.. I feel like Alice in Wonderland.. falling down a big, black hole and never being able to find my way out again.  It will always happen.  It will always be like this.  I'll always be Alice in Wonderland, falling down that dark hole. That’s what grief is.  That’s what it means to... Continue Reading →

Side Effects.

Since I lost you, I lost myself. I had to start over. I had to try to live again. Since I lost you, I developed severe mental illnesses. I’ve developed severe anxiety, that came with PTSD.  I have also developed a panic disorder.  All for which I now take multiple medications multiple times a day.... Continue Reading →

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