It’s been awhile, almost a year since I’ve last wrote. My writing was part of my therapy, part of putting my words, thoughts and feelings down on a screen. Acknowledging that this is my life now, that this is the real deal. I’m not dreaming, I am very much living in this nightmare. Still, after... Continue Reading →
It’s the most wonderful time of the year..
Everyone says this is the most wonderful time of the year, but I beg to differ. I used to be like everyone else. I used to enjoy the cheesy Christmas decorations, baking dozens of cookies, listening to Christmas music obnoxiously for hours on end, going Christmas shopping.… that’s not me anymore. It’s hard to pretend... Continue Reading →
Time. There is never enough time. There is never enough amount of time to have a living soul here on earth. Time comes and goes, flashes from one moment to the next. We measure time in seconds, minutes, hours… But after I lost you, I don’t measure time anymore. I measure time by my memories... Continue Reading →
Alice in Wonderland
It happens again.. I feel like Alice in Wonderland.. falling down a big, black hole and never being able to find my way out again. It will always happen. It will always be like this. I'll always be Alice in Wonderland, falling down that dark hole. That’s what grief is. That’s what it means to... Continue Reading →
Since I lost you, I lost myself. I had to start over. I had to try to live again. Since I lost you, I developed severe mental illnesses. I’ve developed severe anxiety, that came with PTSD. I have also developed a panic disorder. All for which I now take multiple medications multiple times a day.... Continue Reading →